I'm Dreaming of a Right Christmas

In the spirit of Christmas the right wing is going all out to out-Scrooge old Ebenezer.  Whether it’s campaign ads, bigotry, piling on the poor or just plain mean spirited orneriness the only thing on their gift list is the shaft.

Tis the season.  No not that season.  We’re 11 months away from the presidential elections, the Iowa caucus is looming and the crapola (read; campaign ads) is in full flow.

                Physician thyself self:  Former physician Ron Paul has aired an ad representing himself as the big dog who’ll trim, well maybe that’s the wrong word; let’s say hack, 1 trillion dollars from the budget in his first year.  His notion is to basically eliminate the government starting with the Departments of Interior, Commerce, Energy, Education and HUD.  Paul is the darling of the Libertarian Party which advocates laissez faire which is essentially unfair.  With no real mechanism to account for the poor and the marginalized its simply Social Darwinism dressed up as a political party.  Ron Paul would like us to believe that the system will regulate itself.  Well, it won't; never has, never will.  Do you think Paul remembers the days of pollution with impunity, price fixing, consumer gouging and unfair employment practices?

                The God fearing cowpoke:  Governor Rick Perry is unleashing God in his recent campaign ad.  Ambling up a grassy knoll Perry admits that he’s a Christian and not ashamed of it.  He goes on to say that a problem with this country is that, “gays can openly serve in the military but our kids can’t openly celebrate Christmas or pray in schools.”  Perry continues, “As president, I’ll end Obama’s war on religion and I’ll fight against liberal attacks on our religious heritage.”  I’m not sure what war Rick Perry is talking about.  Prayer was abolished by the Supreme Court in 1962, when Barack Obama was about one year old give or take a couple months.  As for that religious heritage, Mr. Perry should probably avail himself of a history book where he’ll find out that the founding fathers were pretty clear about not favoring any one religion over another.  He should probably steer clear of a history text from Texas; they’re trying to rewrite history in the Lone Star State.  Correct me if I’m wrong but didn’t we just recently go through a long strange trip with another buckaroo who was a religious zealot and former Governor of Texas?

I’m a Christian and I’m ashamed of it:  Well sometimes anyway, like when a bunch of sanctimonious bluenose Fundamentalists twist the corporate arm of a home improvement chain to pull it's ads from a show on TLC called All-American Muslim.  As the TLC website describes the show, “All-American Muslim takes a look at life in Dearborn, Michigan--home to the largest mosque in the United States--through the lens of five Muslim American families.  Each episode offers an intimate look at the customs and celebrations, misconceptions and conflicts these families face outside and within their own community.”  Essentially the series portrays Muslims as real every day Americans while putting down that popular notion that they spend their time stoning women and making bombs in the basement.  In stepped the bluenose Florida Family Association which decried the show as “propaganda that riskily hides the Islamic agenda’s clear and present danger to American liberties and traditional values.”  And so under pressure from the religious right Loews pulled it's ads from the program.  It seems that the FFA didn’t get the memo that those American liberties include freedom of religion.  And if we want to look for an agenda all we need to do is to lift up the wet rock of the religious right to find an agenda that would seek to impose its notion of morality on the entire nation while quashing not only religious freedom but a legion of other freedoms.  California Senator Ted Lieu has threatened to sue Loew’s if it doesn’t reinstate the ads.  While his heart might be in the right place Senator Lieu might want to rethink that lawsuit.  While Loew’s action is reprehensible and cowardly it has every right to advertise where it wants.  Just like I have every right to avoid Loew’s like a Biblical plague.  

Mitt Romney goes 5 thousandths of a percent in:  In last Saturday’s Republican debate Rick Perry insisted that Romney has never admitted to flaws in the Massachusetts health care plan passed in 2006.  Romney insisted back that he has and backed it up by offering to wager Perry 10,000 dollars to settle the issue.  Outrage ensued that by suggesting such a bet Romney is clearly out of touch with average Americans.  No shit.  But I didn’t need to see a man worth 202 million dollars offer to bet 10 grand to know that he’s out of touch.  They’re ALL out of touch.  Are Rick Perry at 2.8 million or Newt Gingrich at 6.7 million any less out of touch for having a couple less zeroes than Romney?

Hey mom I got a “A” in toilet scrubbing:  Now for something that we should really be outraged about let’s consider Newt’s suggestion that poor children should do janitorial work at the neighborhood school in order to learn a work ethic.  In his own twisted words here is Newt’s rationale; "Really poor children, in really poor neighborhoods have no habits of working and have nobody around them who works so they have no habit of showing up on Monday." So Newt’s idea is to get rid of janitors and put children to work.  Now that’s what I call killing two birds with one stone; putting janitors out of work en masse and rolling back child labor laws.  Oh yeah, I forgot to mention that Newt declared that some child labor laws are “truly stupid.”  Gingrich is just the kind of fellow who would call Tiny Tim a malingering little brat and order him to either produce a doctor's note or get rid of that crutch.

If this is victory I'd sure hate to see defeat: It's mid (fiscal) year in California and a revenue shortfall, a result of the GOP digging in it's heels against temporarily extending existing taxes, will force billions of dollars in cuts to balance the budget.  And guess what programs are getting the ax.  That's right, school bus service, education and programs to help the disabled.  But the most breathtaking part of this story is the gloating of Republican Assemblyman Jim Nielsen who declared victory, saying "We have proven again and again that those tax increases were not necessary to balance the budget."  Huh?  Well by that logic lets just cut everything; no services whatsoever just so we can balance the budget. Hell, create a surplus.

The Boehner that stole Christmas:  The House passed the GOP version of a bill to extend the payroll tax cut for 160 million workers.  Now let me say right off that I'm willing to pay more taxes.  This country needs more revenue and if the sticking rich aren't ready to step up to the plate then I am.  The problem with the Republican bill is that not only is it extortion but in keeping with the GOP penchant to kick a man when he's down it contains a number of odious add on provisions.  It would stigmatize the unemployed by allowing states to administer drug tests in order to collect unemployment benefits.  The bill would shorten unemployment benefits by nearly one half from 99 weeks to 59 (I guess they're betting that those mythical job creators will finally put up and create jobs in a little more than a year.).  But give the Republicans credit because in order to finance the bill they're hitting the wealthy right where they live by preventing them from getting food stamps.  In case you didn't get that the first time, let me repeat; the Republican bill prevents the wealthy from getting food stamps.  "But Thurston how will we ever be able to afford our caviar and Dom Perignon if we lose our benefits?"

So on this Right Christmas don't forget to hang that stocking with care so the right wing can stuff it to the brim with coal; and then tell you that it burns clean.