What Exactly Did You Meme By That?

“How about you turn in your guns,” President Obama said, pointing a threatening finger.  Well there it was; right there on the internet, right there on Facebook.  I could see it in my mind as if it were really happening.  The President of the United States is knocking on my door, flanked by two U.S Marshalls and trailed by those suited guys who sport shades and earpieces.   And then he says, “How about you turn in your guns.  Boys", he says to the marshals, “do your duty.”  And so they push me aside and march into my home like SS storm troopers and ransack the place until they find the two black powder Civil War replicas that I’ve used in reenactments.  And then The President of the United States and his minions go on to pillage the next house, leaving me to sweep up the shattered bric –a- brac and right the overturned furniture.  Sure as hell it’s going to happen.  It has to because I saw it on Facebook, on the internet and in a meme.  Because if it’s in a meme it must be true. 

Well before you take me for a gullible puddin’ head that actually wasn’t my reaction.  My reaction was to respond, “Where and when did he say that?”  After a little back and forth, a gun enthusiast allowed that the President really never said that.  The original poster owned up to posting it because he liked the bear in the meme’s adjoining frame.  Well there you have it.  Like a cartoon bear - piss off thousands and spread an outright lie that the lazy and simple minded accept as fact.  But isn’t that what these kinds of memes are meant to do?  Let me post a half truth and see how many chains I can jerk, how many sycophants I can get to agree and how many dimwits I can get to swallow a fable.

Understand that we’re not talking about the puppy that drinks from the toilet or the cat that topples the Christmas tree memes.  No, this about the ones that are supposed to capture an important political or societal issue in a single photo and snappy line.

It’s all a sad byproduct of an impatient gotta have it, gotta do it now society that encourages and rewards speaking first and asking questions later.  There is a cure for this but it takes what folks can’t be bothered with; the few minutes to do some research and verify the veracity of what they’re posting.  Oh hell no; better to pull the trigger now and come off like a dumbass later when somebody pulled up your claim on Snopes and exposed you as the bullshitter that you are. 

Instead of putting words about Muslims in the mouth of that picture of the world’s most interesting man put your brain to work.  I know it’s hard but you might garner a measure of respect if you actually formulate your own argument. Be a thinker. 

But what if lying isn’t your game?  Well, you can always use the irrelevant.  Some of my favorites are images of one of the founding fathers above an attributed quote.  Recently I saw a pro-gun meme with a stately George Washington saying, "A free people ought not only be armed and disciplined, but they should have sufficient arms and ammunition to maintain a status of independence from any who might attempt to abuse them, which would include their own government."

Okay, I’ll be that guy and pose the blasphemous question.  Who gives a shit what George Washington said about guns?  He was a great man but he died in 1799. What worked two centuries ago in a brand new nation doesn’t necessarily work now.   Washington and all of the founders lived in an 18^th century world and have been hailed as visionaries by some of the same people who would see them as ignorant Luddites, mired in their own times.  Isn’t that a bit dismissive?

 

The awkward moment when you lie about the man who allegedly could never lie

Oh and by the way that quote attributed to Washington was doctored.  According to mountvernon.org what he really said was; "A free people ought not only to be armed, but disciplined; to which end a uniform and well-digested plan is requisite; and their safety and interest require that they should promote such manufactories as tend to render them independent of others for essential, particularly military, supplies."  So it has the distinction of being a twofer; it’s irrelevant and crapola all at the same time which makes the creator a double dumbass. 

And then there are the memes that have no other purpose other than to piss people off.  You know the ones; devil’s horns on Donald or a forked tongue in Hilary’s mouth.  No words needed here.  The image says I want to just poke you in the eye.  And to what end?  It’s reminiscent of my childhood when we took glee in blacking out the teeth of some celebrity magazine photo. 

Know a Christian that you’d like to fire a zinger at?  Post a meme that dismisses faith as superstition.  What in the hell do you care?  Leave people alone to let them live their lives as they choose.  I suppose it’s an opportunity for readers to see you as the superior, rational sophisticate grounded in reason and science that you think you are.  The test here is, would you walk into a church and proclaim to the congregation your sophistication and their ignorance?  Yeah, I didn’t think so. 

Why does all of this hack me off?  Well, they’re undignified and really not very creative.  But worse than that they’re representative of things that have gone sideways in our country.  They reveal the laziness that stifles research; a disappointing lack of independent thought and the gullibility that swallows any snake oil that appeals to one’s prejudiced tastes.  And finally they represent an insidious virus of meanness that’s infected our society.  It’s the sort of petty baseness that emboldens characters like a blowhard businessman who would be president to stand on his pulpit and vomit his bile of hate.